Six years ago, I was present for my first birth. It was the day after my own birthday. My dear beloved friend April was giving birth to Elijah, her first baby boy, and I had the honor of being there with her. I got the call that she was going to labor and JUMPED in the car to meet her and her husband at the birth center about two hours away!
I was nervous when I arrived, I remember standing outside for a minute to collect myself before I went in. When I went inside, things were pretty calm- they were just setting things up. My memories are a little fuzzy, but I remember snapshots. Early on, April talked with the birth workers about possibly getting in the tub at some point (she didn’t end up doing this). When she was a little further along she told us how much the contractions hurt. One of my favorite moments, the one that brings me to tears and makes my heart feel like it’s sinking and flying at the same time, was near the end when April looked at me and said “I don’t think I can do this”. I was in complete awe, amazed, mind blown! I looked right back at her and said in a strong, slow, low voice “yes you cannnnn”. She did… I was so proud of her! I saw the top of her baby’s head as it was crowning, I watched those big, brave, selfless pushes at the end, and then I got to see her take him in her arms, teary and tired but soooooo full of joy and love.
It was one of the most beautiful things, by far, that I have ever seen. It makes sense that April’s birth would be an event that shaped my career path- she is woven deeply into the fabric of my life and has had an almost mysteriously profound part in the critical moments and turning points in my path- from finding my people to finding myself to getting sober, etc. But those are stories for another time. I took photos that transformative day. But three computers, two cameras and over six years later, I can not find the images. I will not give up the search but until then, I will treasure that sweeeeeet POWERFUL experience that continues to inspire me on this journey of birth photography.
